amos posted a comment on Friday 10th October 2008 5:46pm for Chapter Six - An Offer Vernon Can't Refuse

I would have to agree to mathiasgranger's review. The romance scenes are hmm, how can I say it nicely? Not good.

mathiasgranger posted a comment on Wednesday 31st October 2007 3:32am for Chapter Six - An Offer Vernon Can't Refuse

Well, interesting chapter, but I must admit I am nauseated that you have spent ten times more space describing Ron and Hermione's kissing experiences than you have even talking about Harry and Hermione.

Oh boy they really enjoyed that hug they shared...not to begrudge the story at all, but the romance aspect is really...well not good.

Perhaps realistic, but not enjoyable to read in any manner. I can only assume it will get much worse before it improves.

Thanks for writing,
Matt

TxA_GunFighter posted a comment on Thursday 6th July 2006 1:05am for Chapter Six - An Offer Vernon Can't Refuse

Good chapter.

gunny

Alexis posted a comment on Wednesday 24th May 2006 1:49pm for Chapter Six - An Offer Vernon Can't Refuse

Another wonderful chapter! I'm really enjoying this so far. I laughed hysterically at Vernon and the phone calls. Great plot point! I love Harry's new room and having Dobby answer to him worked wonderfully. Great job!

Ishtar posted a comment on Sunday 16th April 2006 5:11am for Chapter Six - An Offer Vernon Can't Refuse

"If you remember, Harry, when Mr. Ollivander told you of the start of magic as we know it, his ancestor had to learn Latin. Almost all of our spells, charms, hexes, jinxes, and even curses use Latin as a basis for their expression. That realization, when I helped Mr. Ollivander with his inventory these many years ago, caused in me a lifelong fascination with the linguistics of magic."

I find this attitude to be remarkably limited and short-sighted. Surely Dumbledore isn't implying that nobody in the world did magic prior to the Roman Empire and the growth of Latin? Or that people in the Americas or Africa or Asia couldn't learn magic until someone brought Latin there? Or has Dumbledore fallen victim to the "not invented here" school of thought that says anything outside his own cultural experience doesn't count? It's especially obvious that this attitude is false given that he is clearly wrong on the origins of spells: "Avada Kedavra" is derived from Aramaic, a Semitic language; "Alohomora" is a combination of Hawaiian and Latin; "Anapneo" is Greek; and "Animagus" has a Persian root ... and that's just going through the A's of the Encyclopedia of Spells in the Lexicon.

A discourse on how if one is going to cast spells not in one's native tongue one should learn how to think in the foreign tongue would have been better here, I think. Have you ever read Poul Anderson's "Operation Chaos"? In that book, to be effective, spells had to be cast in a language that was strange to the caster, so American students learned Greek and Aramaic, while African students came to the U.S. to learn American slang ... That would have worked here, too.

Christopher Estep posted a comment on Saturday 15th April 2006 1:52am for Chapter Six - An Offer Vernon Can't Refuse

Albus Dumbledore stoops to *blackmail*. (Not Harry, but *Vernon Dursley*.) Amazingly, it works. The amusing part is that *Petunia* is coming around to Harry's side. Meanwhile, the DA members foil several (in fact, *all*) the attempted dementor raids (which HAS to be driving a certain Dark Lord rather barmy). But *what* is Harry going to do about the *Hermione Situation*?

cmzanna posted a comment on Friday 14th April 2006 10:29am for Chapter Six - An Offer Vernon Can't Refuse

this story continues to fascinate me - I enjoyed the first incarnation of it on its own, but this one, with the backstory, the plot and the twists -- I can't wait to see what will happen next!

Ken Warner posted a comment on Friday 14th April 2006 7:49am for Chapter Six - An Offer Vernon Can't Refuse

excellent chapter - although I doubt that even having his nose rubbed in it like he did could cause Vernon to repent of this evil ways.
I do hope that Harry and Hermione get to chance to talkwhen neither is befuddled, and that it leads to the age appropriate snogging that they should be doing.

Thanks for your fine work - warmest regards